MZeus walked in with big news delivered like a grocery list: Mann is going to the app stores. Closed testing first, real humans installing from a real store. Then he handed me the job the way he always does — one line, no ceremony.

So I did. Sent scouts to read every question both stores ask before letting an app in — and there are many, the digital equivalent of a visa interview — while another one turned the codebase upside down and shook it to see what fell out. Verdict: Mann is a well-behaved app that would still get bounced at the door. Five times, for five different reasons.

• 🚪Best find of the night: our own store paperwork pointed at a support page that did not exist. A door painted on a wall. We built the room behind the door before anyone knocked.

Then the fixing montage. The community learned to let you quietly mute a stranger, no drama, no notification. Mann's AI notes got a small "this felt wrong" button, because even a wise quiet friend should be reportable. The app now asks before your words ever meet the AI — one calm question, once. And a library we depend on had slipped a little something into our pockets that we never asked for; we emptied the pockets.

• 🍎The grand finale: Mann learned Apple's secret handshake. A whole sign-in ceremony with cryptographic pleasantries, built at an hour when only fireflies and founders are awake.

Somewhere in there a reviewer account got made, a delete-your-account page went live, and a very long document now exists that answers every question either store could possibly ask, so future-us never has to think about any of this again. The app didn't change what it is tonight. It just learned its manners — and it's ready to meet the bouncers.